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| From left to right: onions, potatoes, three kinds of squash, green beans, tomatoes, cantaloupe |
This is the time of year when there is much hand-wringing and pessimism about the garden. I'm normally an optimistic person, but when it comes to plants I'm trying to grow, I automatically get all doomsday. "They're never gonna grow! Bugs are
eating them alive! Nothing's going to happen...
this soil is terrible! Why aren't they growing
fast enough! It's all my fault...
I'm a horrible gardener!"
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| New potatoes and onions |
All this is followed by a nasty case of Garden Envy, wherein I go around comparing my garden to any other garden I see.
"Look at
that garden! Their squash is, like,
three times bigger than ours!" I whine. The bratty teenage girl rears her ugly head. "Their tomato bushes are three feet tall and bushy, and ours are short and whimpy!
It's not fair!!!"
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| Celebrity tomato plant |
I'm not afflicted with false modesty. You see, the fact is:
I do not like gardening. It gives me feelings of inadequacy and helplessness that are in sharp contrast to my status as a control freak.
What I like is fresh vegetables. What I like is going out to the garden, picking my dinner, and cooking it. I do not care for soil preparation, fertilization/food ratios, and bug identification. All that smells vaguely of math and science, two subjects I vowed to avoid ever since declaring my English major.
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| Cilantro, basil, chives |
I'm well aware that I'm four to six well-pointed Google searches away from all the gardening answers I need, but the thing is I'd rather use that time to bake some bread. Gardening just doesn't interest me. I wish I could just plant the seeds and return six to eight weeks later to some lovely, full-grown, and fruitful vegetable plants.
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| Red bell pepper plant |
I'm open to suggestions. If you see something in these photographs that I'm clearly doing wrong -- like that it's scientifically proven that bell peppers won't grow in a red pot or that since moss only grows on the north side of a tree, cantaloupe can only be planted on Tuesdays -- please let me know. It may as well be Greek to me.
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| This one looks like she might have some gardener in her |
And I'm sure you're wondering what happened in my quest to straighten out the
errant baby squash. I attempted to replant them, but they didn't make it. Turns out errant squash are meant to bloom where they're planted. In their honor, I'm choosing to leave the new errant squash that popped up in between rows alone.
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Be sure to keep your flowering plants apart. A couple of years ago, our squash fertilized our canteloup for a very interesting hybrid. A squash-tasting melon was a hard sell to our kiddos.
ReplyDeleteMark's garden is huge. He says his secret, water every day and fertilize one a week. Presently, his tomatoes, cilantro bushes and pepper plants are the size of a small child.
Your soil looks a little hard and cracked.....work up the soil around the plants to aerate them a little.....that usually helps! Love, Your MOM
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