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Thursday, December 19, 2013

A rapid-fire update

Another month has slipped by since the last time I posted, and I have the standard excuses:
- Busy shopping for Christmas gifts.
- Busy doing homework with the kids.
- Busy shoveling poop out of the chicken coop.

As the last few weeks of 2013 come to an end, I can't help but want to kick this truly awful year to the curb. I'm usually not a pessimist, but this year it seemed that if something could go wrong, it did -- in both big things and small. While there is nothing magical about leaving one year for the next, I'm sincerely hoping that 2014 brings more good than bad our family's way.

With that, here's an (upbeat) update on what's been going on lately:

The Chickens
No news is good news with our four strong girls! These biddies survived an extreme cold snap a few weeks ago like champs. Three of the four lay eggs daily, and when I step out the back door they come a'runnin for me like they have something to tell me. We have a well-stocked egg carton with big, brown eggs.

See how bright red her comb is? In the mornings chickens get a
surge of hormone prior to laying their egg that makes their combs
and waddles very red. In late afternoon the color fades.
I still have no explanation for my love of these birds. My only complaint is that they are turning the beautiful deck that Zach built several years ago into a true "Poop Deck".

Gross, dude.
In the summer they hung out under the deck for shade, but now that it's cold they like to hang out under the patio table for warmth and protection. Pooping ensues. Yuck.

Workouts
From June to November Zach and I primarily used Focus T25 for our workouts.


We went through the Alpha, Beta, and Gamma phases of this program, and it's my opinion that T25 is one of the smartest, most efficient programs ever produced. Beachbody is on the cutting-edge when it comes to workout design, and the research has shown that the most benefits from a workout come within the first 30 minutes or so. This program takes that concept to heart and works you for 25 minutes straight. You do not waste one second! It's a program that will always be in our rotation thanks to the 25-minute time frame and the intensity of the workouts.

We're anxiously awaiting the delivery of P90X3, a program that is also going the 30-minute route.


P90X was our "first love" Beachbody program, so I'm excited to see what's up with X3. My guess is that it is going to be a more well-rounded program than T25, since Tony is all about diversity: strength training, cardio, yoga, there is even a Pilates workout in this program. It should arrive today; we will spend the next two weeks nerdily previewing the workouts and will start an accountability test group at the first of the year.

If you want to join the group, holler at me! X3 is NOT a graduate program -- it's for anyone who wants to commit to exercising 30 minutes a day. (Get your copy: www.SmellsLikeFitness.com)

Three recipes that have rocked my world recently

The Thanksgiving Champion Side Dish
Butternut Squash Apple Cranberry Bake
http://www.simplyrecipes.com/recipes/butternut_squash_apple_cranberry_bake/

Butternut Squash Apple Cranberry Bake Recipe | Simply Recipes


A Chile to Beat All Other Chiles
Pioneer Woman's Chipotle Chicken Chile
http://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/2013/11/chipotle-chicken-chili/
chili2


A Homemade Granola Worth Gifting
Andy's Fairfield Granola from "Buttered Up"
http://butteredup.blogspot.ca/2013/03/homemade-granola.html


The kids
They are a delight.



I hope you and your family have a very Merry Christmas!

**************

Workout of the Day
We created our own mish-mash schedule to follow while we wait for X3. Today we did Insanity: The Asylum Speed & Agility. It hurt. I don't like that one very much!

Thursday, November 7, 2013

Would you visit a dentist who has rotten teeth?

Would you?

If you laid back in the chair and saw that the guy approaching you with the plaque scraper had a grill full of rotting, brown, smelly teeth, would you question his ability and knowledge in the field of dentistry?

I hesitated to write this post because I don't like controversy and I don't want to offend anyone. (Insert the "but" that negates the statement just made right....here.)

But I get so annoyed sometimes.

Before I get into this, let me state that being "healthy" doesn't necessarily mean "skinny." I know plenty of people who eat healthy and exercise daily who might not be considered skinny. And I know plenty of "skinny" people who are far from healthy. You can't judge a book by its cover, but we also can't sit here and deny that probably 90% of the time you can tell by looking at someone whether they are taking care of business when it comes to eating and exercise.

So.

A couple of months ago a few of my fellow boot camp trainers and I set up a booth at a local health and fitness expo. We had the (mis)fortune of being placed next to a booth of ladies who sell a certain "wrap" product. This wrap product raises my ire like few other products on this planet. From what I can tell, you use this product by slathering a concoction all over yourself and then wrapping yourself up like a mummy with some cellophane.

And then you get "smaller."



I must confess I have not wasted spent a lot of time researching said wrap product, and I don't know if it is supposed to just squeeze some water out of you or if it claims to squeeze out some fat...I truly don't know.

I do know that even if it does somehow make you smaller, the solution is temporary at best.

The boot camp instructors at our booth were trim, healthy, energetic, and ate various items from home that they had packed for lunch...you know, obnoxious healthy stuff like raw veggies, shakes, and protein bars. The wrap girls were significantly overweight, sat around at their table all day, and, not to be judgmental (I'm TOTALLY being judgmental): ate Whataburger for lunch.

That weekend I saw woman after woman rush right by our table hardly giving it a glance, only to stop for long, in-depth chats with the wrap girls.

Yesterday at the grocery store I overheard a customer chatting up a worker about how wrapping works. Same deal...a pretty overweight person chatting with another pretty overweight person about how to be "smaller" for a few days.

Oh, my.

Why, why, WHY? So many quick fixes. So many tricks, pills, potions. Sold by people who are clearly not making progress themselves in getting "smaller."

I guess one of the main issues is that the only thing people seem to want to do is get "smaller" one day. There isn't a lot of consideration for what is happening on the inside of your body as far as clogged arteries, blood pressure, blood sugar, etc. and the shortened lifespan that often accompanies these things.

Now I realize that I'm selling something, too. I'm a peddler of exercise and nutrition products. I want people to visit www.SmellsLikeFitness.com and buy Focus T25 and Shakeology. I want girls to join my boot camp and work out with me three times a week. But I feel like the things I'm selling have merit in that the products I sell only work if YOU work. No quick fixes here: you have to commit to doing the work. And it is work. Even if it's only for 25 minutes, Shaun T works you in Focus T25.

I'm first to admit even Shakeology is not a wonder-shake. If you drink Shakeology for breakfast and chase it with a Whopper for lunch and a T-bone for dinner, it's not going to do squat for you. It's PART of a healthy meal plan. You've still got to watch your portions and eat your veggies if you want to see results.

I guess all I'm saying is that if you see someone who hops from quick fix pill, to cellophane mummification, to crash diet, to crazy cleanse, all the while never able to maintain a healthy weight for more than six months at a time, it's just as bad as a dentist with bad teeth. And probably not someone you want to take advice from.

**************

Workout of the Day
Focus T25 GAMMA (Phase 3) Speed 3.0, AKA death by burpees.


Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Homemade Salad Dressing Recipes

I'm wondering if you can do me a favor this Tuesday morning. It's a small favor, even though it's going to sound big. Here it is:

Can you commit to never, ever, ever buying salad dressing again?

I know, I know. Half of you have a scrunched up look on your face because you're wondering what you're going to put on your salads from now on, and the other half thought, "That's cool. I just won't eat salads anymore."

Here's the thing: you can make your own very delicious salad dressing in a matter of minutes that is free of preservatives, dyes, and yucky stuff you can't pronounce. Will it taste like the artery-clogging Hidden Valley Ranch that you love so much? No. Will it be just as good, plus about 14,000 times healthier for you? Yes.

You don't even need any special equipment. Do you have a bowl? You can mix dressing. If you want to get fancy, you can get a shaker cup designed for dressings, but if not, no biggie. You have a mason jar or something else with a lid? You're in business.


I learned about making salad dressing when we did the Ultimate Reset cleanse a year ago. Talk about some delicious dressings! I had no idea how simple it was to whip up your own salad dressing until then, and I've spent the last year experimenting and simplifying until I broke it down to this:

Simple Salad Dressing for the Laziest of Lazies (this means me about four times a week!)
Make your salad
Spray some olive oil on it (you can buy some very nifty spray olive oils at the store nowadays, or purchase your own mister and put olive oil)
Sprinkle about a tablespoon of red wine vinegar on it

VOILA! Surprisingly good dressing and it took about 1 minute.

Say hello to your new best friends!
BUT: Say it's Saturday night and you've got some friends coming over. You need something a little fancier than the old oil and vinegar concoction:

Creamy Garlic Dressing (from the Ultimate Reset)
1/2 cup olive oil
1/4 cup apple cider vinegar
3 cloves garlic, crushed
3 TB fresh lemon juice
2 TB chopped fresh parsley
1 tsp salt
1/2 tsp. Dijon Mustard
1 TB honey or agave nectar

Place all ingredients in a blender and blend till smooth. Makes 8-10 servings.

Basic Vinaigrette
1/2 cup olive oil
1/4 cup red wine vinegar (you can also use balsamic vinegar here)
1 tsp. salt
1 tsp. ground pepper
1 tsp. honey or agave nectar
2 TB lemon juice
(optional) 2 tsp fresh herbs, such as basil, oregano, parsley, or dill

Mix all ingredients together in shaker cup or blender.

Worried about the extra fat in olive oil? Here's an oil-free, vegan dressing from Rip Esselstyn's Engine 2 Diet:

Beam Me Up, Scottie Dressing
3 TB balsamic vinegar
2 TB any mustard
1 TB agave nectar, honey, or maple syrup
Smidge of water.

Mix all ingredients together in a shaker cup or blender.

There you go! Four simple dressings that will keep you out of the fatty dressing aisle at the store. Try these out and let me know what you think!

***************
Workout of the Day
Asylum 2: Upper Elite

Ah...60 minutes of crushing the upper body. Asylum 2 is one of my all-time favorite programs. I've been struggling with my lower back for the past few weeks, but I think I'm seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. I was able to give this workout a very good effort -- probably 85-90%, which is better than I've been able to do for the past few weeks. Felt great! (May not feel so great tomorrow...)




Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Fun containers make life...funner

We are four weeks into the school year, and I'm pleased to announce that school lunch making hasn't broken me yet!

It's probably not a hard guess that I don't let my kids buy school lunch, even though my foray into lunch duty a couple years ago showed me that sometimes school lunches might not be so bad. I don't get crazy with my kids' lunches; I just make sure that their PB&J is made of natural peanut butter and non-high fructose corn syrup jelly on their whole wheat bread, is all. Most of the time it's pretty tame.

Last year, I utilized a wide assortment of plastic ware to fill their lunchboxes with tasty vittles. And at the end of the day, here is what my counter looked like:



Ay yay yay...By the end of the year I just wanted to burn those stupid containers. They wore me out with the washing and the drying and the putting away, over and over and OVER again. ("Why don't you just send plastic bags?" many of you are wondering. My inner hippie won't let me, that's why.)

So this summer I hunted for a new storage solution for lunches, and here is what I found. At Garden Ridge. For five bucks.

So cute! So colorful!
These dumb containers make my day every time I make school lunches. Why? Why does it please me so to fit the little muffin in the side container? With the old containers, I felt stuck in a rut. I made the same lunch over and over.

But these containers make me feel like creating lunch masterpieces! Earlier this week I sent Drew with a turkey breast sandwich (nitrate free, from Zaycon Foods...shameless plug alert: use this link to register at Zaycon to find a meat event in your area. This meat is the bomb-diggety, and I get credits when you register and order some fantastic meat for yourself!) https://www.zayconfoods.com/refer/zf11780

Anyway...The turkey sandwich was on whole wheat rounds, spread with low-fat cream cheese and topped with some homemade cranberry sauce. Holla! It was so awesome I had to make my own for lunch that day.

Up there in the picture you've got turkey wraps on wheat tortillas with grapes, dried apples, pretzels, and a homemade banana pumpkin muffin.

That little lid snaps over the tortilla/sandwich section, then the whole thing folds again and snaps into a box.

When the kids get home they unload their lunch sack and I've got TWO things to wash. That's it.

The other day I was glad to see I'm not the only one who takes delight in random containers and uses it for motivation to eat healthy. My friend Lauren (check out her fabulous blog Salt & Sequins) posted this photo to her Instagram the other day saying that these cute little containers make her more likely to reach for fresh fruit and veggies:
"When I first started my weight loss journey, I was reading a book called 'PUSH' by Chalene Johnson, she had a really great tip, make healthy stuff front and center in your refrigerator. Display it ready to eat, cleaned, in cute bowls. I did have bowls, but they were too high and hid my fruit, so last night, I found these little beauties on sale. And if you know me, my Interior Designer side flipping loves the way this looks in my refrigerator. And yes, my refrigerator is chalk board. It got pretty beat up on the way to Cali, so Tim painted it for me. Best husband award right there."


Lauren, did you know that we also have a chalkboard paint fridge? How come you live in California? You could live in Texas and we could make special trips to IKEA to buy containers and chalk for our refrigerators, then swing by Central Market to ogle and buy overpriced organic produce. It would be fun!

Another mind trick I use for myself and the kids is cute water bottles to promote more water drinking. Spend a few bucks on a water bottle that you think is so cool and you'll probably use it more often.

Try it and see if it works! And send me pictures in case I need to get the same container as you.

**********
Workout of the Day
Les Mills Combat 30 Minute Kick Start. Oh y'all, this workout is so fun. I almost forgot what it's like to be a super cool fighter chick, but it only took a second of punching with those gloves for me to remember. I pumped up the music and punched and kicked my way to an awesome workout. You should try it. Seriously. www.SmellsLikeFitness.com




Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Burritos, Chickens...But not chicken burritos

I want to tell you about a very good butternut squash and black bean burrito that I fixed for dinner the other night, but first: a chicken update.

In a bitter twist of chicken irony, Polly, the lone survivor of the massacre and former picker who was rehabilitated when I chucked a tennis ball at her, is being picked.

Ugh.
See that bald spot on the right bottom part of her backside?
Also, see that chicken on the right? I love how it looks like she's
about to take flight. In actuality it's the butt of another chicken.
Dear Readers, I ask you: when is enough enough? Should I give up my chicken dreams and sell the whole outfit coop, stock, and barrel? Because I just don't know what to do. NO ONE is earning their keep by laying any eggs around here. I CANNOT figure out who is doing the picking because I've never seen any of the four new chickens (who I call Natalie, Blair, Jo, and Tootie) be anything but scared of Polly because she is the queen bee and is rude to them (pecking at their heads and chasing them from the corn I throw on the ground, for example).

And even if I did see somebody pick at her I'm not sure I could pick the perp out of a lineup because:

Can YOU tell these birds apart?
I know it's all very entertaining but I just don't know if I can do it anymore. These girls better start laying some eggs STAT so I can remember why in the world I put up with this nonsense. 

And just so ya know? I did have to rub Vicks Vapor Rub on a chicken butt AGAIN the other night, and it didn't seem to do a dang bit of good. 

Let's move on to a happier topic: Butternut Squash and Black Bean Burritos.

We had an absolute bumper crop of butternut squash in our garden this year. It was fantastic! I planted seeds from a squash I bought at the store, and the plants went absolutely nutso. Do you know how expensive butternut squash is? You see it at the store and you're all, "Oh, 99 cents a pound! That's not so bad!" and then you roll over to the register and the sucker weighs 4.75 pounds and you pay almost five bucks for your squash! They are HEAVY. 

When someone in this house asks what veg we're having with dinner, it's a pretty safe bet it's going to be butternut squash in some form: roasted, mashed, soup, and now in a burrito. 

And this is after we've been eating the crop down for a few weeks!
Good thing that these squash last a good long time.
I saw this recipe on Pinterest and, (drum roll, please): I actually made it! This doesn't happen often. If you don't already follow me on Pinterest I suggest you do so: I pin fabulous, gorgeous-looking meals that I'm sure would be delicious if only I'd remember to make them. (Here is my Pinterest page, if you are so inclined: http://pinterest.com/sshobbs/boards/)

This recipe is courtesy of the vegan recipe blog Oh She Glows, which I was already aware of through Angela's Green Monster Movement site of delicious spinach smoothies. (That's right, I said spinach smoothies. Look into it!)

Since I have SO MUCH squash on hand, I was eager to try these babies out, and they did not disappoint. Drew liked them, and I'm sure Kate would have too if she hadn't been "in a mood." I even packed them in Drew's lunch the day after!

So, here's the recipe. Check out Angela's blog for many more great vegan recipes and pretty food. Enjoy!

Black Bean and Butternut Squash Burritos

Black Bean and Butternut Squash Burritos

Yield: 4 burritos or 3.5 cups of filling

Ingredients:
1 medium butternut squash, peeled, cubed, & roasted
1/2 cup uncooked short grain brown rice (yields: 1.5 cups cooked)
1-2 tsp olive oil
1 cup chopped sweet onion
2 garlic cloves, minced
1 red pepper, chopped
1 tsp kosher salt, or to taste
2 tsp ground cumin, or to taste
1/4 tsp cayenne pepper, or to taste
One 15-oz can black beans (about 1.5-2 cups cooked), drained and rinsed
3/4 cup Daiya cheese
4 tortilla wraps (large or x-large)
Toppings of choice: (avocado, salsa, vegan sour cream, spinach/lettuce, cilantro, etc)

1. Preheat oven to 425F and line a large glass dish with tinfoil. Drizzle olive oil on squash and give a shake of salt and pepper. Coat with hands. Roast chopped butternut squash for 45 mins. or until tender.

2. Cook brown rice (for directions, see here)

3. In a large skillet over medium-low heat, add oil, onion, and minced garlic. Sautee for about 5 minutes, stirring frequently. Now add in salt and seasonings and stir well.

4. Add chopped red pepper, black beans, and cooked rice and sauté for another 10 mins. on low.

5. When b’nut squash is tender remove from oven and cool slightly. Add 1.5 cups of the cooked butternut squash to the skillet and stir well. You can mash the squash with a fork if some pieces are too large. Add Daiya cheese and heat another couple minutes.

6. Add bean filling to tortilla along with desired toppings. Wrap and serve. Leftover filling can be reheated the next day for lunch in a wrap or as a salad topper.


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Workout of the Day
Focus T25 Rip't Circuit

Why does a 25-minute program wear me out so bad? I suspect it's because Shaun T is some sort of evil genius.



Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Three Oxymorons of Fitness

Oxymoron: something that is made up of contradictory or incongruous elements.



Oxymoron of Fitness #1: To get energy, you need to expend energy.
Otherwise known as: an object at rest tends to stay at rest, and an object in motion tends to stay in motion. (Thanks, Isaac!)



I'm betting you experience this phenomenon on lazy Saturday mornings. You get up, get breakfast, and park it on the couch. Next thing you know it's lunchtime. You're stuck. You're not in motion. But if you were to get out of bed, go for a short jog, then eat breakfast, your day looks a lot different. You have energy to take care of things. That activity in the morning carries through your entire day. An object in motion stays in motion.

When Zach and I started exercising at 5am five years ago, this phenomenon blew me away. You mean I was "giving up" two hours of sleep, but I felt more energized, more alert throughout the day? You bet. It's oxymoron #1.

Oxymoron #2: If you want to lose weight, you must EAT.
C'mon, I know you've had this thought before: "Shoot. I need to lose a few pounds. I'm going to skip breakfast and lunch and just eat dinner today."

That's called the starvation diet, and it works. For about a day. Then one of two things happens:
A) You are SO HUNGRY and SO CRANKY that you eat a day's worth of calories at the dinner table, or
B) You are successful in starving yourself for a few days, and your metabolism rewards you accordingly by slowing down a notch or six, causing you to hold on to every ounce of fat because clearly there is a famine going on.

If you want to be healthy and lose weight, you must feed your body regularly. Preferably stuff it recognizes like veggies, fruit, lean protein, whole grains. (If you want some recipe ideas, click on the "Recipes" label on the right side of this blog. I'm not posting these recipes for my health...I'm posting them for yours!)

There are many methods to the madness of eating, but here's how Zach and I do it:
6:30am: Breakfast (usually Shakeology, oatmeal or eggs)
9:30am: Morning snack
Noon: Lunch
3:30pm: Afternoon snack
6pm: Dinner

We eat like infants on a strict schedule. And why wouldn't you eat that way? You're not hungry and your metabolism is revving like a fine-tuned engine. I've messed with cutting out snacks and I end up gaining weight. I feel like this is the world's best kept oxymoron secret: EAT to lose weight!

Oxymoron #3: If you are retaining water, drink more water.
I don't have solid evidence on this belief, but I think that most people in America walk around in a dehydrated state most of the time. We drink plenty of "stuff," but not near enough water. Here's what happens when you don't drink enough water:
From APEC Water, www.freedrinkingwater.com
Water helps your liver convert fat into usable energy. If you don't drink enough, your kidneys are overwhelmed with concentrated fluids, and they will make your liver do extra work. Your liver works hard to turn your body fat into the energy that you use but if it has to do the kidney's work, then it simply hold onto the extra fat that would have been burned off if you simply had enough water. 
And what's worse is that instead of excreting water and waste products, you body retains existing water to reuse. This is what causes water retention and bloating. When you don't get enough water, your body panics and holds on to it selfishly, as though you're in a famine. Dehydration thus can make you look bloated and fat instead of thin and taut. The best way to get rid of this water retention is to drink enough of it to return your body and its processes back to a normal equilibrium. 
Water regulates body temperature, filters out impurities, and keeps the brain working properly while transporting nutrients to and from cells. While the human body can store energy as glycogen, fat, and tissue, it cannot "store" water - the body uses its own water but expects us to provide a continuous supply of fresh new water regularly to function. Water is critical in moving nutrients into and out of a cell, an action known as the "ion pump". When you take in the improper balance of sodium and potassium or do not drink adequate water, your body will increase a hormone and try to "retain" water by keeping your kidneys from filtering it. Ironically, one of the best ways to stop retaining water is to drink more water!
If you have trouble with water retention, turn to oxymoron #3, which says to drink more water to get rid of water!

The great news is that all these oxymorons boil down to the following facts:
- If you exercise, you're going to have tons of energy to expend on the other things you've got to do in life.
- If you want to lose weight, you get to eat* on a regular basis.
- If you drink water, you get to lose that extra water weight you're carrying around.

What's not to like about oxymorons?

* By eat, I mean real stuff like the things in my recipe section. Not Cheetos.   

Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Love, Loss, and Chickens

I sat at my desk in the house, which was quiet for the first time in nearly three months since the kids went back to school earlier that morning. A bump at the door, hard enough to make the blinds swing, interrupted the peaceful morning. I got up to see what had caused the noise.

Before I even stepped outside I saw something terribly wrong. Brown feathers everywhere, swirling in the wind on the patio. I swung the door open and stepped into the chaos of a dog attacking one of our chickens.


***************

This has been a difficult year for our family. In January Zach and I entered our tenth year of marriage with high hopes. We booked a trip to Disney World and made plans to celebrate our anniversary with a night out on the town at a concert, like we used to do before we had kids. 

Then came the diagnosis: Zach's Dad had stage four esophageal cancer. Prognosis was grim.

Ever since I've known him, Zach and his Dad have had projects. They put down ceramic floors. Laminate floors. Fixed troubled A/C units. Removed engines from trucks to change timing belts. Built patio covers (twice). Built our shop/gym. Four years ago they embarked on the ultimate project, the one they had always dreamed about: building a cabin on the land that they bought together. 

It took three years to build, mostly during three-day summer weekends. They built that cabin from the ground up, by hand, with no help. It's beautiful. Every time I walk in I cannot believe what an accomplishment that place is. A testament to their creativity, their hard work, their determination, their teamwork. 


While they were in the process of building the cabin, I often told Zach, "You know you guys are building your Dad's retirement cabin, right?" And we were fine with that. Nobody deserved a retirement cabin more than Zach's Dad, and we were happy that he was going to spend many quiet, lazy, retirement days at the East Texas cabin in the woods.


Two days before his official retirement he learned he had cancer. Seven months later he was gone. 

Sad is not the default state at our house. As a family we have fun, we work hard, we try to look for the positive in things. But this year has been Confusing. Troubled. Worried. Fearful. Bitter. Angry. Sleepless. It has been Sad.  

*************
I stepped out on that patio where the neighbor dog from two doors down was attacking my chicken, and I Lost It. I screeched at the top of my lungs, which stunned the dog enough for me to kick it away from the chicken. Since the dog had squeezed through a small gap in the gate, there was nowhere for it to retreat. I chased it across the backyard and cornered it by the fence, where I kicked it and screamed at it. I just wanted it to go away, to leave my chicken and me alone. I fumbled with the chain on the gate and opened it. The dog ran out of the yard.

I hoped that somehow the other chicken had escaped to the coop, and opened the door to see that there was just an egg in the nesting box, that was it. 

I looked under the deck where our chickens hang out in the day, and I saw Ginger's dead body lying among a pile of feathers. Polly wedged herself between the shop and the deck, not seriously wounded but obviously traumatized.

I sat down on the deck and sobbed. I sobbed for my dead chicken. For my scared chicken. For my kids, who have experienced more death this year than any two small kids ever should. For my husband. For his sisters and mom. For all the years of retirement stolen from my father-in-law by that bitter thief, cancer. 

Then I gathered myself as best as I could. Called Zach and told him about the situation. Got a bag and a hoe and removed the dead bird from under my deck. 

The previous day Zach and I had discussed buying more chickens, since two eggs per day was not quite enough. We decided to go ahead and pick up four more chickens to smooth out what would be a rough conversation with the kids. While ordinarily this might be a chance to teach our kids a lesson about loss, we felt like it's a lesson they've learned many times over already this year. 


And so we move on, adjusting to new circumstances. Trying to find a new normal.


Monday, July 22, 2013

And then there were two

Rest in peace, Roxie. You were a good, fat chicken.

Several weeks ago I took a look at our last leghorn from our original flock and I told Zach, "There is no way that bird can live very long. She is So. Huge."

A week or so after that we made an appointment with "The Chicken Lady" in the town next to ours. "The Chicken Lady" is not a derogatory term; that's really what she calls herself. She's a lovely woman, actually. We made a pilgrimage out to her farm to see what we could learn from the expert on all things chicken (and goat, by the way). We told her we'd like to add to our flock, but knew that it needed to be handled delicately.

The Chicken Lady and her husband were very gracious and showed us around their very impressive chicken and goat farm. During our visit we learned several really important things, but the most important thing we learned is:

We really should have bought our chickens from The Chicken Lady seven months ago. 

As we wandered over to see their impressive flock of chicks, Zach and I told the Chicken Husband about the crazy leghorn we have that was positively HUGE despite not really seeming to eat much more than the others.

"What color are her eggs?" he asked.

"Light brown," I said.

"You don't have a leghorn," he said. "What you have is a broiler."

A broiler?

"That chicken was bred to be slaughtered for meat around 45 days of age. They are engineered to get very big, very fast. Soon she will stop laying eggs, and her body will overwhelm her legs so that she won't be able to walk anymore. Then she'll most likely get sick and die, if you don't take care of her first."

Oh dear. Once again, the kids' favorite chicken in peril. Should have been slaughtered five months ago. Dangit. 

"What other breeds do you have?" The Chicken Lady asked.

"Rhode Island Reds," Zach replied.

"Ugh. MEAN birds, those Rhode Island Reds. I refuse to carry them anymore," she said. "They are great layers, but they do not get along with any other breeds. If you want more chickens, you've either got to get more Rhode Island Reds, or get rid of the Reds."

GEEEEEEZ! Can I catch a break in the chicken department already? Now I've got one bird doomed by obesity (ironic, considering my job as a trainer and fitness coach), and two birds that are so nasty they can't be around any birds but each other. And I'm not even going to revisit the violent chicken events leading up to our current situation.

The kids were present for the entirety of our conversation with The Chicken Couple, and Drew immediately knew something was wrong with Roxie. We told him that most likely she wouldn't live much longer, but as long as she wasn't in pain we would keep her and enjoy her company. (Her eggs never have been up to snuff, as she continued to lay soft-shelled eggs that we don't eat every other day or so.)

Fast forward to this past weekend, and Roxie has developed an awful looking limp. She's extremely dirty from laying around all the time, and generally looks miserable. Zach and I decide that it's time to do something, and warn the kids that it won't be much longer.

I'll spare you the details of Roxie's departure and simply FADE TO BLACK on that good 'ol bird. I'm going to try to remember her cheerful, trusting nature, and that fantastic waddle.

Now we are down to two birds, but boy can they lay some beautiful eggs. We do want more chickens, though, so the plan is to create a temporary space where we can house five or so chicks that we buy from The Chicken Lady, and raise them while we keep the Reds for their laying skills. Once the new chicks are laying then we will find a home for the Reds, which shouldn't be too hard because people will crawl all over hens who are already laying, whether they're mean or not.

Oh...how did the kids take it, you ask? Well, today we learned another lesson about the delivery of bad news: do it when cartoons are on. It softens the blow considerably.

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Workout of the Day
Focus T25 Total Body Circuit

I've got to get off the subject of chickens and devote an entire blog to how FANTASTIC this workout is. Just 25 minutes a day of pure, hard work. The smartest, most efficient workout I've ever done. 

Sunday, July 7, 2013

Protein on the cheap

We have been working on this "clean eating" thing for quite a few years now, and I think it's safe to say that eating nutritiously costs more. It's a sad fact, but in my opinion it's a worthy expense to spring for a few pounds of apples versus a 14-pack of Snickers bars.

But there is one food staple that can give you tons of good protein on the cheap: dried beans.

I've been using canned beans for convenience for quite awhile now. They are just simple and fast, and relatively inexpensive. But one day I was perusing the dried beans and saw that a bag cost less than a can. I was interested to see how much a bag would make. Here's what I found:

The can is pinto beans and the baggies are chickpeas, but you get the idea.
One can (approximately a cup and a half) of beans: about 99 cents.
One bag of beans (yielded six cups): about 89 cents.

And the best part? The beans I cooked taste better than the canned beans.

After that little experiment, I was sold on bagged beans. I decided that I'd commit to making large batches of beans to store in the freezer. Today I cooked two bags of chickpeas and a large bag of black beans.

Investment: about four bucks. Yield: 21 cups of beans.


Beans are a tremendous source of protein that are full of fiber, water, and antioxidants. And they have no saturated fat to clog your arteries.

Three ounces of chicken has roughly 21 grams of protein. To get the equivalent amount of protein in black beans you would need to eat about 1 1/3 cups.

Here's the other good news about cooking your own beans: pre-soaking them reduces the flatulence factor! Apparently soaking the beans allows the beans to release enzymes that break down complex sugars into simple sugars, and since it's the complex sugars that are responsible for gas, then the soaked beans are less likely to give you the toots.

I have really grown to like beans in the past year or so. I'll eat those chickpeas up there out of the sack like they're a snack food (as will Drew).

Check out my "Recipes" label on the right to find plenty of bean recipes. Here is how I prepare my beans from the bag:

- Remove beans from bag and remove any duds/stones/crazy lookin' ones.
- Soak them overnight or at least for a few hours in a big bowl. Put lots of water in the bowl because the beans will soak it up.
- Strain beans and rinse with more water.
- Put beans in a large pot with water about 3 inches above beans and some seasoning: salt, pepper, garlic powder, onion powder, cumin, chili powder...whatever you like. You could even dice some onions or peppers in there if you like the spice.
- Bring beans to a boil then reduce to a simmer. Cook for around an hour and test the tenderness.
- Remove the beans from the stove and strain the water.
- Wait for them to cool and then place in freezer bags in 1 1/2 cup increments.
- Freeze 'em up!

These beans thaw pretty quickly so they're available to use on salads, for hummus, or for whatever you're fixing that day. Try it out! Your waistline and checking account will look better for it.

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Workout of the Day
Les Mills Combat 30

Focus T25 starts tomorrow!

Thursday, June 27, 2013

Summer in rapid fire

Oh my. It's been nearly a month since I blogged last. This summer has been jam-packed with trips, chickens, gardening, bike riding, chigger bites, grandparents, cousins, swimming, Insanity (the workout, not the state of mind), and boot camp training. With each day that passes it becomes more apparent to me that I'm not going to be able to give each subject due time in its own separate blog, so I've decided to do a rapid-fire re-cap.

In no particular order, here's what's been going on this month:

#1: Losing teeth!

In the interest of full disclosure, this actually happened in May, but this picture of Drew's dangling tooth is so hilarious and awful that I felt it must be included.


#2: Team Beachbody Coach Summit in Las Vegas

Zach and I had a good time in Las Vegas for the Coach Summit meeting. We met new/old friends, participated in live workouts and training, and heard John Maxwell speak. The fabulous ladies below I've know through Facebook for the better part of a year, but only met in person last week.


We did a live Les Mills Combat workout with about 2,000 people that was super fun. Here's Zach getting his aschiva on (spelling? this is one of those martial arts terms that I have no idea how to spell).


Vanilla Shakeology! This one was a surprise. Beachbody has been looking for a "clean" source of vanilla for nearly three years, and they finally found it in the Malagasi farmers of Madagascar. The vanilla plants are hand-pollinated by these farmers!



We also got to meet and talk with Darin Olien, the co-creator of Shakeology. We listened to him speak about the process the team went through to find a natural vanilla source, and I was blown away by the integrity of Beachbody as a company.

They absolutely refuse to compromise on quality of the ingredients in this shake, while investing in the livelihood of indigenous farmers around the world. Beachbody is essentially providing microfinancing to these farmers to help them grow crops in a sustainable fashion, while supporting the Madagascar economy so that schools can be built.


Please take a minute to watch this video:


But how does vanilla Shakeology taste, you ask? As always, we go to the kids for an opinion:



We also tried out Shaun T's new Focus T25 workout live, and bought the program to start in July.
Each workout is only 25 minutes long, and I'm pretty sure it's going to be a game-changer. More on this topic to come!


And finally, at Summit we participated in a super workout with about 7,000 people. I'd estimate we were a half mile from the stage!

#3: I made this, and it was yummy:

Roasted Vegetable Cous Cous from Southern Living

#4: I have a GREAT IDEA, Mom!
How about you put one braid here, and another braid here, and then put a pony tail in the middle. And then put this barrette in too, okay? Isn't that a GREAT IDEA?


#5: MONSTER ZUCCHINI PLANTS


#6: Chickens laying eggs

The peace in the coop continues, and Polly has begun to lay eggs along with Roxie! We have a suspicion that Polly may also be eating some of her eggs, but it is thus far unconfirmed. We are keeping a close watch.




In case you missed Roxie running on Facebook, here you go. It will change your life.


#7: I read this book, and it made me twitchy and preachy about processed food.


#8: As a result of #7, I sought and found some jelly at the store that does not contain high fructose corn syrup. Hooray! (Yes, this is still a processed food, but it's a lesser evil, and kids gotta have some PB&J in their life! I'm just glad I can do it with straight up sugar rather than HFCS.)


Whew! That's it. Two more trips and many more fun things to go this summer.

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Workout of the Day

Insanity Pure Cardio and Cardio Abs

Monday, June 3, 2013

Polly, Rehabilitated

I am pleased to report that there is peace in the coop. Against all odds, Polly the Picker has been rehabilitated.


Everything I read said that if you've got a cannibalistic chicken in your flock, you will most likely have to cull her. We didn't know what we would do, so we separated her for two weeks, allowing only supervised visitation with Roxie and Ginger.

The Vicks on Roxie's behind kicked off the rehabilitation process, but you know what finished it? This:

One night we were out pitching the ball to Drew so he could hit it. I was the pitcher, and I looked over at the chickens only to see Polly pick at Roxie's behind.

I chunked that tennis ball as hard as I could and nailed that chicken.

She jumped in the air, squawked like crazy and ran for cover behind the coop. It was the last time we saw her pick.

I bet PETA would have some issues with me lobbing tennis balls at birds, but you know what? It was that, or ring her neck. I think even PETA would agree the tennis ball was a kinder option.

Roxie and Polly, peacefully co-existing.
Now the pecking order is clear: Roxie, Polly, Ginger. Although Polly and Ginger have been having little episodes where they bow up at each other and feathers get ruffled. Not sure what that is all about quite yet.

Roxie is giving us roughly an egg a day. Sometimes she skips a day, and sometimes the egg is huge and sometimes the egg is small. Zach cracked two huge Roxie eggs the other day and got six yolks. This morning I fixed Drew "Egg in a Hole" with two perfect little Roxie eggs, one yolk per egg. We're gettin' there!

I'm hopeful that Polly is nearly ready to lay, as her waddle and comb have gotten bigger and are bright red; that's a sign that they are close to laying, and that is what happened with Roxie.

Last week we had three chickens and three rabbits grazing in our backyard.
Sometimes the chickens chase the rabbits, which is entertaining.
The kids are still enamored with these chickens. They play with the chickens way more than they ever played with our dog, and the highlight of their day is to go feed the chickens a handful of corn. Well, actually that's the number two highlight behind checking for eggs.

I have to admit I'm pretty enamored with them, too, although I really can't figure out why. I still feel bad about Nadine and wish she was still around. We have thought about adding another hen but we don't want to rock the boat just yet. Polly's delicate mental state may not take too well to a new bird in the flock. I can't believe I'm considering a bird's mental state. That's life with chickens, I guess.

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Workout of the Day
P90X2 - Chest, Shoulders, and Triceps