It's tough out there for a health nut couponer

Earlier this year I attended a two-hour crash course in "Couponing" led by a local expert who has perfected coupon clipping into an art form. She's not, like, "Extreme Couponing" material or anything, but she did have a binder, a system, and a serious passion for coupons.

It was eye-opening and pretty inspiring, too. I had no idea how, with a little time and effort, you could really work the system and save a significant amount of money. Since I stay at home and do not rake in the dough (yet!) with my Beachbody and contract copy writing jobs, I thought maybe I should give it a shot. Saving money's almost as good as making it, right?

So back in March I decided to dip my toe into the coupon clipping waters, and you know what I found out? That water's pretty cold if you're a health nut like me.

Take this week's coupon offering, for example:

Here we have your three Totino's pizza food groups: the Party Pizza, the Pizza Rolls, the Pizza Stuffers. Serve that up with a side of potatoes in a box (Tastes as good as homemade!) and you've got yourself enough fat and salt to last you about 7.5 months. Don't forget your wide variety of sweet rolls in a can. (I'll remain silent on those...I should not judge those which I would devour two cans at a time with my Dad when I was young. We had...have?...a thing for cinnamon and frosting, is all I'm saying.)

I like this one:

Biscuit sandwiches and egg scrambles from Pillsbury, who assures you in all caps and bold letters that these are REAL INGREDIENTS, REAL TASTE.. REALly? I'm guessing that those eggs may have been sorta real at one time, but I can assure you that whatever lands in that freezer section as solidified egg matter is about as far as REAL as you can get. Do yourself a favor and just buy some actual eggs.

Like these, maybe:

Save 35 cents on cage-free eggs. At least somebody's appealing to the health-conscious.

Oh look! Here's one from Green Giant. Finally! I can do frozen vegetables. They're really good, sometimes actually even fresher than the vegetables in the produce department because they're flash frozen right after being picked. Unless, of course, they're slathered in some kind of sauce.

Never mind.

Mostly my weekly clipping session results in a coupons for cereal, yogurt and granola/protein bars. Maybe some soap. On a good week I might find a coupon for Sun Ripened cherry tomatoes, or something.

But the silver lining is that since March 24 of this year I have saved a grand total of $270.68, the equivalent of about two weeks' worth of groceries, or three months' worth of Shakeology (at the wholesale coach price). Not bad for six months of amateur, health-nut coupon clipping and price matching.

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Insanity: The Asylum - Strength